June 18th, 1998........................Day of Moody Basset Hounds
There is Hope for the Future After All
An 18 year old girl named Kate Logan decided that her graduation speech for the private Long Trail School in Dorset, Virginia, would be much more memorable if she gave it naked. Opting for a "Road Less Traveled" theme and thanking the staff and her family for encouraging her individuality, she stepped out of her cap and gown and in nothing but the sunshine, finished her speech. The fellow graduates and audience, understandably, were stunned... The administration went into massive spin control denouncing her as a free thinking radical who in no way expressed the opinions, beliefs, or fashion sense of the faculty as a whole. I, for one, can only thank God that we live in a country where a girl is free to engage in such subversive activity, and can only hope that the video of the speech hits the Internet soon.
Now, admittedly, if it had been a guy, it would have been a disgusting act of perversion. I never claimed to have a single standard for much of anything. But you have to concede that for a girl to decide to do this at a graduation ceremony takes big brass ovaries at the very least. Hell, I wish I could afford to give Kate a scholarship to college for having the guts to express herself like a true individual, not just one of those, "Let's all be nonconformists together, ok? ok?" wannabes that think that weird makeup and unsavory piercings make them rebels.
If more women would get naked at important events, I think it would get the attention of people. Naked women are generally an appreciated thing, though there are aesthetic considerations to be sure, and perhaps it would even help lend credence to the Governments fascist BMI weight chart if this were allowed. The Monica Lewinsky press conference? Strip! Let's see the goods the President were after... CNN Live Events... Strip!... Hell, I'd watch C-SPAN if a decent looking woman was undressing while she discussed the importance of the Medicare Initiative... And I'd be voting along party lines for that one, I guarantee.
I think nudity should become more prevalent overall. The Christian Coalition and Fascist Fundamentalists think that all sex is bad, therefore, the opposite is empirically true. Imagine, say, a funeral service, where the grieving daughter takes off her clothes, saying, "Naked into this world we're born... and with a backless, tie-on suit we leave... I'll miss you Daddy..." Brings a tear to the eye just thinking about it, doesn't it? Or the "Happy Birthday, Mr. President," song as a strip tease... Birthday suit for that special occasion... It could open up a whole new industry of spokesmodels, when you think about it. I don't pay much attention to Allen Greenspan's economic reports when they're on... He's ugly and boring... But I know it's important... Put one of those CNN babes out there naked, and I promise to take in ever last word of the state of the economy.
I wish I knew Kate Logan. She is an inspiration to us all. And I can only pray that young girls everywhere will not see her as an exhibitionistic opportunist, but view her as the role model she is, expressing her individuality by shedding every last shred of materialistic conformity and allowing all to judge her as she really is... Naked... God Bless this great land of ours... But that's just me.
.
Quote of the Day:
If a man who drives a tiny sports car has a small penis, and a man who drives a big truck has too much testosterone, what does it say when a man drives a minivan? As far as I'm concerned, it screams, "I'm a wife-beaten pussy," but at least they're practical.